How Friendships Change In Adulthood

There is no denying that friendships change as you age. When you are young, you probably think you will have the same best friends forever. But unfortunately that is not always the case. But for some people, this is definitely possible and it happens. This is How Friendships Change In Adulthood.

As you get older, the type of relationships/friendships you have are going to change. The friendships you have in high school/college will definitely change as you enter into adulthood. As I’ve gotten older I’ve made my way into different roles in my life. I’m now a wife and a mother. I’ve realized that friendships are going to change along the way (and that’s okay).

Friendships are going to change as you get older:

There will be less “best friend dates”

You may not see one another as often as you would like or as often as you did previously. Life happens. You won’t have the amount of time you once had to spend with your bff’s as you did previously. And that could be because you have other/new relationships/people in your life – and that’s completely normal. You may be a new mom or be/have a husband/significant other. A career move may have forced you to another state, city or country. It’s okay that the time spent with your best friend decreases. But that usually means that the quality is better than the quantity. Which leads to the next way your friendships change.

Quality over Quantity

Time becomes precious as you get older, and it could be for very different reasons. With new families, careers, and schedules, it is much harder to schedule the time you once had. Your schedule might make it hard because you have to prioritize other responsibilities in your life. Unfortunately it’s time to say goodbye to your young college days. The days where you spent the majority of your time with your best friends. Back then, you had way fewer responsibilities. Now, it’s time to say goodbye to quantity, and start saying hello to quality. 

The overall relationship you have with them will change

I remember always going to my best friends for any and all support or advice. Just wanting to have deep discussions about my latest heartbreak or their most recent hook-up. I wanted someone to be there for me to help me feel like I wasn’t alone. And for someone to tell me that it was okay that I was failing one of my classes.  I would look to them for comfort and support when I was in my teenage years and college routine. As I got older, I didn’t need their support for those reasons. I now needed them to tell me what I should wear on a first date. I needed a listening ear to tell someone about my drunken stories at the bar.  I needed them to help pick out a theme for my wedding.

My life became a lot more stable as I got older. The topics during our ‘best friend dates’ were changing. As you get older, instead of getting together with your friends to drink through a heartbreak, you are probably calling your friends to have your first girls night in almost 4 months. The weekly late night bar hopping may turn into a bi-monthly break from the kids. The relationship will be different, but that’s because your lives are different. Phases in life are happening and changing constantly, and so will your friendships.

You will grow apart

It’s as simple as that. You will grow apart from the people you aren’t spending as much time with. Even though you swore when you were younger that your friendship would never change. It’s important to remember that just because you grow apart from them doesn’t mean the friendship is over. You have to take into consideration the different phases you are at in your life. But that should never mean having resentment towards the other person. If your friendship is as strong as you thought it once was, it should remain strong. Even if there is some distance added in the relationship. Especially if that distance is happening because of your different phases in life.

You become friends with different types of people

When you’re in your teens and younger twenties, you usually have friends within the same age group. Or your friend group will all have similar interests. As you get older, you find friends who may be older but will still have similar interests as you based on the stage in your life. Family, kids, career, etc. Your friend group will no longer be with people who you went to high school/middle school with. Your friend group will expand to people you never thought it would include.

It’s more than okay to have friendships change as you age. Just because your friendships are different than before, doesn’t mean they are any less important. Growing is important in life. So is change. Changing relationships and how you view them is inevitable.

That is How Friendships Change In Adulthood.

Here is a great article about friendships changing as you age.

As always, be sure to check out some of my other blog posts by clicking HERE.